Dr. Cuddles | Cuddle Therapy | Professional Cuddler

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A Guide to Avoiding Unwanted Attachment: How to Maintain Healthy Boundaries With Your Cuddle Buddy

It’s a scenario all too familiar to many: you’ve found someone you enjoy cuddling with, and you’re both having a great time. But then something changes, and you start to feel like things are getting a bit too intense. Before you know it, you’re in a relationship that you didn’t sign up for. If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. Many people have been in the same situation, and it’s not something to take lightly. Fortunately, there are ways to avoid getting too attached to your cuddle buddy and maintain healthy boundaries. In this guide, we’ll discuss how to do just that. We’ll explore the importance of setting boundaries, how to recognize when your boundaries are being crossed, and how to navigate uncomfortable conversations. By the end, you’ll have the tools you need to create and maintain healthy boundaries with your cuddle buddy.

Why Setting Boundaries is Important

First and foremost, setting boundaries is an important aspect of taking care of yourself. It’s also important to consider your reasons for setting boundaries. If you’re setting boundaries out of fear, you may accidentally send a message that you don’t want to cuddle at all. On the other hand, if you set boundaries out of respect for your cuddle buddy, you’re more likely to maintain a healthy relationship. Finally, having healthy boundaries can help you avoid getting too attached to your cuddle buddy. It’s important to remember that you’re not in a relationship with your cuddle buddy, and there are no promises of a future together. Setting healthy boundaries can help you avoid getting your heart broken.

How to Set Boundaries with Your Cuddle Buddy

The first step to setting boundaries with your cuddle buddy is to figure out what your boundaries are. This might sound obvious, but it’s important to get clarity on your end. You might decide that you want to set a time limit, and you might want to cuddle while fully clothed. Take some time to think about what would feel best for you. Once you’ve identified your boundaries, you can share them with your cuddle buddy. In the case of time limits, you can simply let your cuddle buddy know that 30 minutes is your limit. You can even set an alarm to let them know when time is up. If you’re not comfortable sharing your boundaries in person, you can send your cuddle buddy a message or call them to let them know what works for you. Bear in mind that it may take some time for your cuddle buddy to fully understand your boundaries. Give them time to adjust, and be patient while they do.

How to Recognize When Your Boundaries are Being Crossed

If you’ve set boundaries with your cuddle buddy, you’ll know when they’re crossed. Unfortunately, not all boundary-crossing is obvious. It can be challenging to recognize when your cuddle buddy is going against your wishes, especially if you’re new to cuddling. To help you recognize when your boundaries are being crossed, it may be helpful to identify your "cuddle words". Cuddle words are words or phrases that let you know you’re uncomfortable with something. For example, if your cuddle buddy is going against your wishes, you may feel anxious. If your cuddle buddy is reading your body language, you may feel tense. Having cuddle words in place can help you identify when your boundaries are being crossed. Even if you’re not 100% sure that your cuddle buddy is going against your wishes, it may be helpful to let them know. That way, they can adjust accordingly.

How to Navigate Uncomfortable Conversations

If you notice that your cuddle buddy is crossing your boundaries, you may feel uncomfortable bringing it up. There are a few strategies that can help you navigate uncomfortable conversations. First, you can try using empathic communication. Empathic communication is like speaking from your cuddle buddy’s point of view. Next, you might try using the broken record technique. With this strategy, you simply keep repeating your requests until your cuddle buddy respects them. And lastly, you can try using the sandwich technique. With this strategy, you first let your cuddle buddy know that you appreciate them, followed by your request, and then finish with another appreciation. These strategies can help you to be more assertive, while still keeping your cuddle buddy’s feelings in mind.

Strategies for Staying on Track with Your Boundaries

Once you’ve set boundaries and navigated your way through any uncomfortable conversations, you may be wondering how to stay on track with your boundaries. To help yourself stay on track with your boundaries, you can create a cuddle boundaries contract or a cuddle boundaries list. A cuddle boundaries contract is a written agreement between you and your cuddle buddy. A cuddle boundaries list is simply a list of boundaries you create for yourself. Once you’ve created these tools, it’s important to revisit them often. There will likely be times when you want to adjust your boundaries, and having a written agreement can help you do that. Moreover, having your boundaries written down can help you to stay consistent with them. By revisiting your cuddle boundaries, you can make sure that you’re honoring your requests and staying true to yourself.

Conclusion

When you’re cuddling with a friend, it’s important to set boundaries. You don’t have to put on a pair of blinders and pretend like everything is ok when it’s not; you can let your friend know that something feels off and that you need for them to change their behavior. If you both communicate openly and honestly, the cuddling experience can be a lot more enjoyable for everyone involved. With that being said, it’s important to remember that you’re not in a relationship with your cuddle buddy. While cuddling can be a great way to get physical touch, you don’t have to cuddle with everyone you want to be close to.